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Why do you continue your pretense by ignoring me and blockading our interaction? Yet you lurk gleefully in the shadows assiduously observing my every move with alacrity. Cheering silently when you see me stumble, hovering around menacingly like a vulture, waiting for me to fall, with the words “I told you so” etched on the tip of your tongue. Yet before you celebrate your triumph too prematurely, you should be wary of the dangerous assumptions that you make. My demise is by no means imminent and my suffering I assure you is merely temporary.

Yes, I have made the choice voluntarily to go down this treacherous path despite it being the road less followed. Craggy, crooked and confounding as it may seem, it leaves no space for victimhood nor despair. Far from being a lustful prison as you contend, it is the domain of freedom governed by quiet discipline, perseverance and sacrifice. An arena where demons are fought every day until the fear in my soul evaporates. For I have nothing left to lose. The boats have long been put to the flame.

And you speak of accusing hands and keys in pockets. To what avail? Lest you forget it is you who hides your emotions? It is you who has run away? Yet you claim you are searching for what you know already lies deeply within your heart. It would seem rather that you are the one who is afraid – of (true) love? of truth staring at you down the barrel of a gun? of your own insecurities? Isn’t that it? I suppose what they say is true: There is a fine line between love and hate.

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